Where God guides, He provides
This quote is in reference to Isaiah 58:11. The scripture that God gave me personally a while ago. (I’ll share it later in another blog.) It’s kind of funny because in the ESV version it doesn’t say that, so I didn’t put the two and two together that this popular saying, “Where God guides, He provides” comes from that scripture.
The Lord always prepares you no matter what. Whether it’s a scripture He keeps throwing at you or something He knew you needed down the road. He always prepares His children.
Leaving my job behind, with only a car payment to my name, I needed to make some funds for me personally to support my own debt aside from ministry cost. I kept asking the Lord “How?” and I felt He just kept putting some peace in my heart that He will provide. But like, “Lord, which way??? Again, like how?”
I’ve told people, I’ve told young girls that it’s ok. Step out by faith. God always provides. I’ve never been without. But when it gets down to it and you’re counting every penny, you feel bad for wondering if you’ll be ok.
I think of the story in the Bible of Peter who needed to pay his taxes and had nothing. Jesus told him that since the sons are free, go pull the first fish that comes up on his hook and there will be enough money for him and the Lord. At this point I don’t think Peter even questioned Jesus. He just went and did it knowing that He always provides. It’s hard in ministry (nothing against people) but they say they will support (not only my ministry but others) and then don’t. You quickly realize that you need to depend on the Lord. This particular Bible story kept playing over and over in my head.
He provides just enough for the time needed.
Because of COVID, I no longer can just volunteer at schools. So I put my resume on Ajarn.com (ajarn means teacher in Thai) and applied to every local school that I could. Scrolling through the website, there were hundreds upon hundreds of foreign teachers looking for a job; within the same week I posted my resume while others just uploaded theirs. Here I go again, worrying. Because for real, some of these people have four different degrees & teaching certificates and here I am with only a high-school diploma and one teaching certificate. I prayed and was wondering how the Lord was going to work this all out. None of it is in my hands – which of course is a good thing but can make my anxiety go up.
Surprisingly, I immediately had several interviews within a week! Some were way too far, some I didn’t like, and I even had schools reaching out to me that I didn’t even apply for. Everyone said they would get back with me that weekend.
One school stood out to me the most but there was some conflict involved. One of the problems was that I don’t have a degree so I am currently on an ED Visa studying Thai. My classes are at noon (the time I will be teaching) so I couldn’t do both. After my second interview, I told the school I would let them know if I wanted the job the next day. I put my self on an awful time crunch. Why didn’t I tell them I would let them know in 3 days?
I woke up the next morning with my stomach in knots. I had to tell them I couldn’t take the job. I felt like it was right for me. I had peace about it but yet logically it didn’t work out with my Thai schedule. “Lord, what was I supposed to do?” If I took the job, I couldn’t pass my Thai tests and I would be abusing the visa. (And by doing that you can really get kicked out of Thailand.) So doing what any normal person does, I laid in bed worrying, trying to force all the puzzle pieces together that could never fit.
“God, why does my life have to be so complicated? It feels like that with everything.” Next thing I know I got a text message from the Thai School that my classes were moved from afternoon to evening classes at night.
Everything fell into place just like that.
My God is that good! I emailed Beaconhouse Yamsaard School and told them I would gladly accept the position as a Kindergarten Teacher. This job doesn’t pay much because I don’t have a degree and also not in America, but the Lord as given me a mission field and at the same time provides just enough.
Where God guides, He provides!